MisAdventures In Labyrinth Land!
by Aviarianna O Lorien
Summary: ON HIATUS! IDEAS WELCOME!Chapter 5 is rather serious...Swearing, naked Goblin Kings, LSD laced fruits,Rabid Fan Squirlssp purposly, neverending supplies of paintballs, Giant Care Bears, and one little halfbreed who's goal in life is to drive Jareth insane
1. She Has Arrived!

Mis-Adventures in Labyrinth Land

By Aviarianna O' Lorien

Disclaimer: I own nothing of the multiple movies and books and products you will surely recognize in this fiction. Got it? I own NOTHING accept for Avi and Fe-Kay. (although on technicality, he owns himself…. uh yeah…. shutting up now!)

Chapter 1: She Has Arrived!

The Labyrinth.

Or more specifically, the Castle Beyond The Goblin City where King Jareth sleeps soundly. In all truthful fact, a war could have been raging in his very bedchambers and the man would still not raise a single delicate (snorts) eyebrow. Of course, that would only make this that much easier.

There is a huge grin plastered on the pale face of a figure clad all in black. A female figure with long auburn hair flowing out from underneath a black beanie adorned with all manner of pins, including but not limited too: HIM, Viva La Bam, Demented Happy Bunnies, and a Heartagram patch to finish it all off. There was an evil glint in her burnt-orange eyes and her excessively long, sharp canines made her grin look rather feral. Such eyes and teeth flashed for only a second in the silvery light of the Fae realms crystalline moon as she disappeared from the courtyard in a flash of sapphire blue with a brightness to rival even that moon.

Jareth never knew she'd been there, but he would…

((((((((((((((((((((Morning in the Goblin Kingdom))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

"AAAAAAAVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" The extremely enraged shriek of the Goblin King was heard throughout the Goblin Kingdom and beyond that morning.

A flash of crimson light nearly blinded Jareth for a full minute. And suddenly, there stood Avi. There stood Avi in all her dark blue flared jean, purple with bright green palm tree's flip flopped, blue tank topped, pin and patch covered beanie, long haired glory. Or it would have been glory had she not lost what little footing she had the moment she'd appeared and fallen directly onto her arse. Ah well, she paid it no mind and stood up to survey the damage that had gotten Jareth screaming like a toddler.

"You called Jar-O.o…" As quickly as he possibly could, she clenched her eyes shut and turned her back towards him. "GOOD GOD'S MAN! COVER YOURSELF!"

Jareth looked down at himself and gave a nervous chuckle. (It's not that dear little Avi hadn't seen such a thing before. Oh no, she was far from innocent! But one day she walked in on a sleeping Jareth. A butt-naked, sleeping on top of the covers, Jareth. She ran from the room screaming her lungs out.)

O.O "Heh. Right…"He quickly pulled the sides of his blue/silver silk robe closed, tying the sash tight enough to more than likely cut off the circulation.

"Are you decent yet Jareth?" Avi asked with a hint of indignance and a heap of disgust.

"Yes, dear little kitten." He answered and so Avi turned to face him once again.

There was a smile on her face and childishness to her eyes. She was attempting to look as innocent as the short version of her name implied. But she was also trying to make the attempt as subtle as possible. She frowned finally, her furry black tail swishing in (acted on her part) confusion as she survey the entirety of his room.

"AI! Jar-bear, it looks as though a tornado hit his place!" She looked around for another moment before adding "A rather colorful, mortal loving tornado." She observed this quite brilliantly. (Even if she was the one who had done it…) She tried her very hardest not to laugh, and still look oh so subtly innocent in the destroyed room.

The Damage Report: All around the room were little heaps of mortal clothing. Jeans, T-Shirts, Button-Ups, Tanks, Slacks, Cargo's, Hoodies, Jackets, Addida's, Converses and even a nice pair of shiny leather Dress Shoes. (Those seemed to have been placed delicately on the desk. Everything was also exactly Jareth's size. And how Avi knew his size is something no one should ever want to know.) Of course, there were still tights and poet shirts littered about the room, sparsely, but there all the same. These however, were all now colored Tye-Dye style in neon pink and purple. The lone pair of HIS boots were completely lavender and sitting haphazardly in the middle of the bed, seeming to drown in the dark blue sheets that resembled a frozen in time whirlpool.

The slightly adolescent half-breed burst out laughing, no longer able to hold it all in at the sight of the room and all it's…contents.

Jareth however, was NOT amused.

"Aviarianna O' Lorien…" He began in a voice calm and quiet. A voice edged with a deadly undertone.

"Yes, Jar-bear?" She asked, turning her huge, innocent, eyes towards him. (It takes skill for once such as her to make orange, cat-like, eyes look innocent.) She was failing miserably at keeping the grin off her face though, and making that smile look innocent just was not going to happen.

She blinked.

Once more Jareth was clad in his favorite outfit. (Albeit was tinted neon purple with hot pink swirls and his pants matched his lavender boots perfectly.) He smirked evilly at the shorter girl, who's eye's had now widened considerably. (Any wider and her eyes would have fallen right out of her skull!) Jareth's eyes were taking on a slightly darker, redder hue.

This time, she winced.

"Run." Was the only word to escape his mouth in a dark, deadly voice.

"Shit!" She ran from the room as fast as her legs could take her with the Goblin King following hot on her trail.

"Avi! You will pay dearly this time!" Rang out throughout the entirety of the Goblin Kingdom.

"I'M SOOOORRRRRYYYYYY!" Was the terrified shriek that answered it.

(((((((((((((((((((((((Three Hours Later))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

"Okay…this garden is as good a place as any to hide, and rest." Avi muttered to herself, climbing up into a low but large branch of a weeping willow. Jareth's castle had many beautiful gardens all around it, all of which were inside the walls that separated the castle from the city. She'd been dodging Jareth for the past few hours and was beginning to get tired. (Consider she'd been up half the night at least 'working' on Jareth's room.)

Damn that guy could be scary!

She lounged on the branch and took a bite of the apple she'd swiped from the kitchens. Never would she ever take any fruit from anywhere other than the kitchens, never. Fact of the matter was that Jareth had mixed orchards around the castle, half the trees had his 'special' fruits, the rest had normal and you could never tell which was which. But the normal fruits always ended up in the kitchens, so it was a safe bet.

"Hi Avi!" Came the familiar, very loud, and very unexpected voice from the branch above hers.

This loud, and surprising intrusion upon Avi's snack/nap time caused the girl to nearly fall out of the tree. She caught herself though, thus she was now hanging upside down on the branch, clinging very tightly to the organic limb by her legs. She opened her eyes, seeing as she hadn't felt the ground and her body met yet, and met a bright, sky blue pair of eyes.

"LEGGO!" She squealed, swinging herself back up to the tree branch, which the newcomer had leapt gracefully down to.

"Stop calling me that!" The blonde elf scrunched up his face in mock disgust at the childish nickname.

"You don't like it?" Avi sniffled; already putting on the perfectly mastered, irresistible, utterly cute, kitten pout.

"Oh no, no no no no no!" Legolas put up his hands in defense, trying to block the sad cuteness. "NOT the pout!"

She continued to pout, unrelenting in the cuteness.

"All right! You can keep calling me Leggo!" He sighed. Five minutes and he'd caved; it was a new record for him. (As in last time he'd held it together for 10 minutes.)

"YAY!" The Hanyou squealed once more and pounced on the elf in a tackle/hug/thing.

Leggo yelped. He then got over the shock of being tackled in a hug, yet again, and hugged one of his best friends back just as tightly. Until, that is, a 'SMACK' filled the garden.

"Keep your hands, off my arse if you wish to EVER bear children." Avi growled, forcefully removing HIS hands from HER butt. She smiled sweetly again and dropped to the grass covered ground below, next to the dirt path.

(Now many readers may be wondering…WTF? What is Legolas doing here? How does this odd girl know him? And so on and so forth. Okay…Avi is a Hanyou, it means half-demon. Now in that aspect, she's a mutt. Now…the other half of her is elf, as in Lorien, as in Rivendell, that kind of elf. She was dropped into Makai as an infant and so adapted full to survive there. But her real family is in Rivendell. She once got back home where she found the family, even got married, but he died, horribly and she left. Legolas was one of her best friends. He is also the only person she'd ever known able to look up someone's skirt from underneath a stone balcony. Yes, he is a perverted elf and even set his tutor's breeches on fire once. They know each other very well. This little fight over the nickname is something that happens weekly with them. Apparently, Avi is winning the rounds hands down. The faster he caves, the more she scores. It's really rather complicated, these two's, and her past but eh…you'll find out more about it later, really. Jareth helped her to Middle Earth the first time, and she'd always come visit, no matter what. Yes, before that she'd lived in our world, and hated it. Again, complicated. And now…back to the story!)

"Hey! Want to hear about my newest prank plans?" Avi asked eagerly. She was always ready to describe her newest evil plan.

"Sure!" Leggo replied, matching her excitement. Until a flash of platinum hair caught his eye's. "Uh, Avi?"

"No now! Anyways, you know how Jareth feels about Care Bears right?"

"Yes. But-"

"But nothing. Well, I conjured up this huge pink one with a big rainbow on its tummy. It's adorable!"

"That's great Avi, but really-"

"Shush! Any-hewsies, the plan is-ACK!" The youth (Well, technically she was a youth.) yelped as Jareth grabbed her tightly and poofed them both off in a burst of glittery, silver spark like things.

"I tried to warn her." Legolas muttered in amusement and, with a shrug, lay back on the branch for a nice nap. Such peace and quiet would be hard to come by soon enough.

((((((((When Jareth and Avi appear again.))))))))))))

When Jareth and his captive re-poofed into existence, they were floating something close to 40 feet above the B.O.E.S. and every single being in existence knows that such a predicament never has a very good outcome.

"Meep!" Avi squeaked as she now tightened HER hold on Jareth, not wanting to fall into the disgusting, sludge-worthy contents of the Bog. Then she noticed the new bridge Jareth had FINALLY put in.

A wooden bridge.

A wooden bridge in a damp, humid, misty, slightly corrosive stench filled, bog.

"WOOD!" She screamed in exasperation. Who puts a wooden bridge in a bog like Jareth's?

This frustrated screech caught the Fae holding her completely off guard. It startled him, and so badly that he let go of her to cover his ears and lost his concentration. Thus, he plummeted 40 odd feet and Avi saved herself by forcing out white wings VERY quickly and catching an updraft. Jareth plunged into the disgusting contents of the bog while Avi hovered 10 feet above it, trying to regain her control over her breathing. Near bog experiences weren't very fun.

Avi watched the bog below her in breathless apprehension. Yes, she should probably be flying far, far away right now but common sense just wasn't with her today. In fact, it hadn't been with her for about 48 hours and counting. Now she watched with a grimace as the now soaked, stinky, and freshly enraged Fae emerged from the bog.

"OH MY GOD'S! She squealed loudly. (Again with the squealing, yes, she does this a lot.) "Jar-bear looks like a drowned rat!" Echoed quite happily throughout most of the Underground, followed by her giggling.

"Damnit Avi!" Was the equally loud, equally emotional reply.

The shouts jolted Legolas awake. He peered through the branches and towards the Labyrinth. "Uh-oh." Was all he managed to mutter as a white winged Avi zoomed past with a look of amused horror on her face. She was closely followed by a very wet, very angry Goblin King if is red face and scowl was anything to go by.

"What's going on?" Came a shout from one of the windows facing that particular garden. Apparently, the shouts had also disturbed the resident fire kitsune from his book-induced reverie.

"Avi's arrived, Fekay!" Legolas yelled back.

"Is that all." Fekay replied before chuckling and exiting the window seat to begin searching through the immense library again. He loved the libraries nearly as much as Avi did and so spent much time in them. Yes, Jareth has more than one.

Sometimes, he felt that Avi's little adventures here should be put into a book as well. After all, her stays always proved to be most…interesting.


	2. Breakfast, Blunders, And Beyond!

Mis-Adventures In Labyrinth Land!

Chapter 2: Breakfast, Blunders, And Beyond!

Around 11 am that day, a few strange things happened.

Legolas had been jolted awake again as Avi zoomed through the garden wit Jareth in hot pursuit. Between her scream, his shouts and the wind force of the both of them, the perverted elf found himself sprawled on the ground in seconds. And there he stayed for several more moments, blinking rapidly and trying to regain his bearings.

Poor Fekay has chosen the wrong moment to step out of the third floor library. Avi smacked by him running from Jareth. Jareth trampled all nine of the kits tails, unnoticing, in his haste to catch her. At lest Avi had the decency to yell back a very hurried "SORRYFEKAY!" to the downed kit. After all, she had been the one to knock him over.

Avi begrudgingly handed over the many un-dyed clothes she'd taken from Jareth's room. She had to be threatened severely with things Jareth could actually back up before hand, but the point is he got his clothing back in prime condition. Most of it, in any case.

Now, it is 11:30 am and Legolas and Fekay find themselves seated in Jareth's "small" dining hall, trying very hard not to laugh.

"Avi let me through!"

"Not. A. Chance. Jareth."

"But it's MY kitchen!"

"So? You can't cook!"

"I can too cook!"

"You blew up half the kitchen trying to boil water for tea!"

"…"

"That's what I thought."

"But-"

"No buts. Go sit down and I'll be out in 20 minutes with the food."

"Fine…"

Jareth trudged to the table and all but fell into his chair. He gave the other two beings a withering glare at their snickers and amused looks. The snickers stopped but the amusement refused to leave their faces.

"Insufferable brat. She better be leaving in a few days." Jareth commented to no one in particular.

Legolas and Fekay exchanged worried and confused looks. At least on Fekay's part it was confused.

"You didn't tell him?" Fekay whispered to Legolas quickly.

"I forgot!" The elf replied with a tiny shrug. Both of them were trying to subtle about this little conversation and failing miserably at it.

"Didn't tell me what? What did you forget?" Jareth question a bit more urgently and harshly than he had meant to.

"Uh…well…" Fekay started nervously.

"Avi's…uh…" Legolas attempted to finish.

"Here till the portal home gets to working." Avi herself, finished from the doorway.

She levitated several trays of food from the wonderful smelling kitchen over to the table, setting them down gently. Her piece said, and the food safely to the table, all three non-Fae beings braced themselves for the inevitable.

Jareth just stared.

He stared wide-eyed at the girl. He blinked a few times, his mouth opening and closing in rapid succession not sure of what, if anything to say at the moment. His mind was registering the fact that this young woman who was worse than his goblins at times, would be staying. Staying for a long while.

See, the portal home had been destroyed. And so…he was in the process along with his advisor of making another one. Now the question of how Legolas got there since he was indeed from middle earth has a simple answer, there was a one-way portal from Middle Earth. It had only been open long enough to send a few through. Elrond did no want his daughter stuck there without some comfort after all.

Besides, the two he'd send would be more than enough to keep her occupied so that she wouldn't be driving Jareth completely nutty. Unfortunately, no one had remembered to tell Jareth Avi would be staying…

Jareth took a deep, calming breath.

"WHAT!"

And elf, a fire kitsune, and a half-breed mutt quickly exited the room. So did a tray of eggs, pancakes and sausage followed by a pitcher each of syrup, O.J. and milk, and one salt and peppershaker. That and 3 plates, knives, and forks mysteriously disappeared form the dining hall as well. It all reappeared in Avi's room, the food landing on her desk and the settings landing on her bed where all three soon sat eating.

"I think he took it rather well." Avi commented around a mouthful of syrup-drowned pancakes.

Fekay and Legolas raised an eyebrow each but said nothing.

Jareth ate in silence, glaring at absolutely everything. Yes, even the poor indifferent salt and peppershaker's left on the table were sent scrambling to hide behind the poor, trembling fruit bowl. Avi was going to be here for at least a year. God's no…this was bad, very bad.

He stumbled to his throne room numbly. He wasn't even kicking goblins; the poor man was so out of it. He literally fell into his throne and glared around him at the chaotic assembly of goblins that had gone deathly quiet at his unusual entrance.

"OUT! NOW!" He roared. The room emptied as quickly as a shoreline during a shark attack and Jareth was left alone to mope. Head in his hand's rubbing his temples; he sat on his throne and prayed.

'Please, please let her behave. Please don't let her destroy half my labyrinth, again!'

(Last time Avi had had to be there for more than a few days, Jareth had been off in M.E on business. Or so he called it. But since he was going to be away a while, he needed someone to watch the place for him. Cue in Aviarianna who he had go to all wishes in his place. She was amazed how stupid some of the wisher's were. Anyways…she really didn't know how to keep the goblins occupied and long story short, she let them run amuck in the Labyrinth, and half of it was completely demolished by the time Jareth got back.

If only he'd reminded her that all you needed was an old children's toy and they'd be occupied for a month easily. Not to harp on Avi or anything…but her memory isn't the best in the universe. Too many hilts to the head in several peoples opinions.)

The images of what that often childish, mishevious, and usually immature young woman was capable of flashed through his mind. Things she had done, things she's probably do again and what in the bloody hell's could she possibly be planning with a huge pink Care Bear? He hated Care Bears! A shudder ran though him of utter horror just imagining what the thing looked like. He could only hope she decided to stay out of trouble soon. She may end up driving him crazy, of course, she hadn't discovered the other person that had been sent over. Oh no…

When she found HIM…he could only hope for the best with this one.

(((((((((((((((((((((((Chapter Fin.))))))))))))))))))))))))

Yes I'm very well aware that this chapter is shorter than the first one but you know what? I don't give a damn. It was a bit more serious, on purpose. And You'll just have to wait until later to know what that Care Bear thing is all about. –grins evily- heh…

Anyways…REVIEW ME PLEASE! Suggestions for pranks for whatever are very welcome and please remember, constructive criticism and downright insulting the writing (Otherwise known as Flaming.) are very different things.


	3. May the Gods Have Mercy

Mis-Adventures In Labyrinth Land

ItsACrystalNothingMore: Gets a crystal for being my first reviewer! And…thank you for the suggestion, Avi shall use the paintball gun to it's fullest extent.

Moonjava: Thank you, I try…

Molko-surprises-me: Aye lassie, of course I'll be keeping this going! Enjoy!

And now….Chapter 3: May The Gods Have Mercy

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

And there it was, the scream Jareth had been dreading since breakfast. She'd found him. Avi had found Trinion, the love of her life. He knew exactly what this meant.

Double trouble.

He also made a mental note to himself to soundproof the couple's rooms. _Immediately_.

The scream was followed by a duller thud. In a hallway not too far from the throne room, Avi had glomped her dearly beloved. Thus tackling him to the ground with one of the biggest smiles she'd ever worn.

And another scream to make Jareth's head throb.

"TRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!"

((((((((((((((((((((The Dreaded Reunion)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

All screaming aside, it was a slightly touching scene.

(But I feel the readers might need to know what Trinion looks like, right? Thought so. Trinion is an elf, from Lorien. He is Avi's husband; they met in an embarrassing situation because he caught Avi after she'd fallen off a staircase, again. Trin is very tall, 6'6 probably and Avi is the shortest elf of all time at a whopping 5"8. Trin is pale, the inner glow kind of pale that is so wonderfully attributed with elves and very lithe. He's got muscle, but he's not overly muscled and he's very swoon worthy with his shirt off. He's got mid-back length dirty blonde hair that is almost always half up half down with one braid in front of each ear. But…the one thing that stands out about him, the one thing Avi loves most other than his personality which is so understanding it's scary sometimes, are his eyes. They are a starburst of greens. Every green you could possibly find in the forest is in his eyes in a starburst of color, so deep and bright yet dark and soft. No one has eyes' liked this but him. Thus Trin and Avi fell in love, literally, were married a few years later, few in Elvin terms mind you, and blah blah blah.)

"Mellethnin!" Avi exclaimed, again, still lying on top of Trinion after tackling him to the ground. (Mellethnin means beloved in elvish, by the way.)

Trin sat up slowly, the young woman he loved now sitting squarely in his lap. He blinked rapidly for a moment before setting his amazing green eye's on Avi's. Avi had begun to think she'd never see those eyes again.

No kiss in history could ever and no kiss in the future would ever, surpass the unbridled love, passion, longing, and lust as was in the kiss Avi and Trin shared in that hallway.

Unless of course you count every kiss those two would ever have, and ever have had since they first realized they loved each other.

When dinner came around, Avi was wearing Trin's tunic, and a pair of shorts and Trin was only wearing his leggings. Jareth was very glad he'd decided to sound proof the couples room right after he'd heard Avi scream at the discovery of Trin. (Oh yes, those minds in the gutter are VERY right.)

Legolas snickered at the pairs disheveled and belated entrance. Fekay just stared, blushed deeply, and became very interested in his plate.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((A Week Later, give or take.))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Avi woke up in Trin's arms, again. She loved to wake up this way in the huge bed, snuggled up to his warm, intoxicating chest. On the mahogany desk sat a rather large and obviously hastily wrapped package. The tag attached read "To Avi-Chan" in a very pretty, fancy script. Avi sniffed the ink and smiled; it was blood. Makai Stag to be exact, 7 years of age and unmated. Tied to the tag was a small letter, folded to look like a fox.

"Oooooo…I'll bet I know who this is from!" Avi muttered excitedly.

"_Dear Baka-Neko_

_I thought you could use some…entertainment while you stuck there. Jar-bear needs a break once in a while or he'll go insane much faster and you'll lose all the fun! Enjoy! By the way, there's a spell on the tag for a Never-ending Supply._

_Luvvies from the Baka Kit: Ria-Chan"  
_

A grin akin to the one she'd worn after and during her trashing of Jareth's room spread across her face. She tore into the package with zeal unrivaled and within moments the cloth covering was in shreds and the tag was placed safely in a drawer in the desk. Avi's eyes widened in malicious glee at what she'd unwrapped.

The Gift: On the tag there was a spell for a never-ending supply of whatever was named. Out of the package fell several guns. Not just any guns mind you, but Paintball Guns. A rifle, a shotgun, several handguns and holsters for all of them.

Oh was Avi ever going to enjoy this. She made a mental note to send the kit a hefty amount of chocolate in thanks. And a hefty supply of sugary soda too, now that she got a better look at some of the artillery.

Yes, the gift was that amazing.

When Jareth awoke that morning, he felt particularly good. Avi hadn't pulled anything in five days. Five whole days! She had been so preoccupied with her beloved Trinion, and he with her, that she hadn't really done much of anything. Anything maliciously mischievous that is.

One would think he would have known better by now.

But no. He never heard the maniacal laughter because Avi and Trin's chambers were soundproof. He never noticed that utterly insane gleam in Avi's eye's and the knowing smirk smile on Trin's face. Nor did he notice the worried glances Fekay and Lego were exchanging because they DID know what that gleam and that smile meant. (And all during breakfast, poor fool.)

"I'm going for a stroll." Avi said, exiting the dining hall in a calm, very un-suspicious manner.

Her hands were clasped behind her innocently as she walked and a smile was on her face. Her light blue sundress leaving only the impression of purity along with the white smile, the pigtails and the light pink lip-gloss. Add those feathery white wings and you've got then perfect image of a modern day angel.

Angel… riiiiiiiiiight.

Oh yes, Avi was such the most believable and complete picture of childlike innocence that not even lego could tell what exactly was coming. That act of hers nearly had him fooled really. In fact, only Trin, who had been there to witness the opening of the gift and the ecstatic jumping around of his wife, knew what she'd planned. He fought the urge to smirk as his beloved skipped down the hall, humming a light, airy tune.

Avi did take a stroll…right back to her room.

She took an hour long shower, dried her hair with a little help from the wind then picked up her present and headed to the closet.

She cackled as she rifled through the huge closet that was occupied by her clothing and Trin's. She was looking for the most appropriate outfit and finally decided on one, exiting the closet with her hair down, eye's feline and insane. She wore a green tank top that was a little small around the chest for her but other than that was just dandy. It was forest green and matched the commando pants that clung to her hips tightly and flared out into cargo's. Her navel showed and she'd apparently decided to paint vine design around it for that's what it had on it now. Her boots were standard elven issue in black, very comfortable and very quiet and she had stuck a holster about her waist, where two pistols were set, a rifle over her left shoulder, another pistol in a shoulder holster opposite the rifle.

Oh yeah…she was ready to have some fun now!

Sorry kiddies, the wrist is throbbing and honestly…Avi's paint ball escapades haven't been decided yet. Your reviews are helpful, after all….the paintball idea was from a reviewer…hehe. Don't worry, I promise that I shall have the next chapter out, as long as Jareth doesn't find out I'm writing this because then he'll kill me or do something worse.

Tah Darlings!


	4. Redecorating the Realm

Mis-Adventure's In Labyrinth Land

Chapter 4: Redecorating the Realm

Fekay was smart. Fekay decided that the safest place to be would be in the library on the second floor in the east wing. Truthfully, any library would have worked but this one had a spectacular view of a rose garden. Avi respected and loved books and so would never even dream of trashing a library. She never even left a bookmark out of place in one of those book filled havens.

Legolas was not so very smart. He decided to take a leisurely walk around the castle. He seemed to have forgotten all about the fact that the halls were never safe when Avi was around. The fact that her eye's gleamed insanity and mischief during breakfast, and that Trin's smile was all knowing in THAT kind of way, seemed to have been forgotten as well.

Jareth remained completely and rather happily, oblivious, to everything. Fekay's speedy exit from breakfast to the library went unnoticed. Trin's slightly evil smirk left him with not so much as a worry. He merely smiled warmly at the beings as they finished eating and left. (This freaked them all out, except for Avi who hadn't been paying attention to Jareth anyway.) He then went to lounge in his large throne. He had an appointment today and felt that nothing could possibly go wrong.

The poor, diluted fool.

((((((((((((With the Poor, Diluted Fool))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

"Your Majesty?" Drawled a very sultry, definitely male and British accented voice.

"Yes Pahlin?"

"I've got the report."

"Oh right! Well come on then, tell me what's been happening."

"Of course…"

Pahlin, adviser to King Jareth. Very hot, very smart, smarter than Jareth in more than one aspect. Pahlin has violet eye's, long raven black hair, he's tall and he's an elf. Not a Middle Earthen though, an Underground species. He also enjoys the clubbing here on good old earth, and has probably been spotted in more than one hot night establishment. In fact, all you ladies who go clubbing may have even danced with this sultry, seductive thousand-year-old hottie. He is also Jareth's partner in getting that portal up and running.

"The Goblins have been behaving as well as…. well they possibly can. Which isn't much but it's the best we can get from them so lets not look a gift horse in the mouth hm? The portal…is going well." Pahlin reported with a slight air of hesitancy.

"It is, is it?" Jareth asked, slightly suspicious. "You're not a very good liar."

"Ahem…. well it seems that the portal may take a bit longer than expected. It IS going well in the respect that it hasn't collapsed onto itself, exploded, imploded, closed, let something bad in, and the Goblins haven't been able to mess it up. However, something is still trying block it, so progress is slow and of course, right now, the window is no larger than your thumb."

"Ah…which means?"

"Avi will be with us longer than a year, sir."

"Damn."

Pahlin gave a small nod and exited, waiting until he was away from the room to start chuckling.

Jareth's face fell once Pahlin had left the room. Longer than a year? Was he seriously serious? Well there went half of Jareth's good day down the drain. Ah well, he wouldn't let a little thing like that bother him, now would he? As long as Avi behaved reasonably, there wouldn't be much of a problem.

Again, the poor, poor, diluted fool.

(((((((((((Mayhem anyone?))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Jareth closed his eyes for a moment and pinched the bridge of his nose in hopes of deflecting the oncoming headache he knew was on its merry little way. Only a moment were they closed, he'd swear it years later writing his memoirs. When he opened them again, red and white targets were everywhere! And he meant everywhere; they were on the goblins, on the walls, the floors and even, oh dear gods, his shirt!

Jareth was only able to contemplate why there were targets painted on absolutely everything from the goblins themselves, to his shirt for about a millisecond. Yes, the goblins remained oblivious to it all, they'd found some discarded Barbie Dolls and were happily tearing the plastic things limb from limb and fighting over the pieces. Jareth at this moment wished he could be this oblivious for the scream that reached his ears was not a very good sign.

"BONZAI!" Rang out about the throne room as Avi swung in on a vine from the ceiling (she loved being able to manipulate matter like that.) shooting everything she could with one of her pistols. She landed in the pillow pit in the center of the room and opted to exchange her pistol for her shotgun and looked about with insane eyes. "Muahahahaha!" She laughed evilly and preceded to shoot every thing targeted in the room, including Jareth.

"Avi! What in the-Ow!" As we all know…paintballs hurt when you aren't wearing any protection. And a thin poet's shirt is NOT protection compared to a paintball going 20 mph from 10 feet. "Ow! Bloody Hell Avi!" Jareth swore at the girl as she continued to laugh maniacally and shoot. Suddenly the shotgun was back on her back and in her hands was a something more akin to a shotgun. A semi-automatic maybe? She didn't know, and she didn't care.

She just set that insane gleam on Jareth's wide and twitching eyes, pointed and shot.

Jareth scrambled to hide behind his throne as she shots hit in on the back, and the arse. He finally made it behind the throne and out of the secret door there. Now he was glad Pahlin had made him add it in after Avi's last little visit.

(Avi's a bit of a prankster, she's very mischievous. Jareth would rather classify the girl as a pixie than an elf, but blood is blood. And unfortunately, this mischievous streak runs in the Elrond's family, believe itor not.)

After thoroughly wrecking the throne room and giving Jareth reason to not sit down for a week on anything other than a pillow of air, Avi giggled to herself and skipped, yes skipped, out into the halls. She now had no guns in her hands, they were all secured to her body by several holsters and she was skipping happily down the hallway. She reached and corner and flattened herself against the wall, all military strategy like.

"Perverted elf prince, twelve O' clock!" She whispered to no one in particular, not even herself.

Legolas was walking down the corridor at a leisurely pace. He had no reason, which he could possibly remember, to be hiding in a library, or his room, or the kitchen. (Those are the three places Avi would never mess around in.) Legolas wasn't exactly the sharpest sword in the armory either.

"PAINTBALL POUNCE ATTACK!" Avi screamed as she jumped around the corner and fired several rounds from both pistols at the very surprised prince. Legolas never knew what hit him until it was all over and Avi was standing there, staring down at him with a smirk of satisfaction and that same insane gleam in her eyes. He's fallen down sometime after an amount akin to about 3 clips per gun had been emptied unto him AND the entire hallway behind him. If that wasn't enough, Avi then preceded to pounce on him so he was flat on his back and she was sitting on his stomach.

"Gotcha Leggo!" She giggled and vanished in a puff of sapphire blue smoke as if she was never there.

Legolas just stared at the empty space with an eyebrow raised so high it nearly disappeared into his hairline. "Why in the name of the Valar did I volunteer to keep that girl company…?" He whimpered to himself, unsticking his paint-covered form from the floor and walking off painfully to go and take a very long bath in his room.

The next few hours were spent with Avi and Trin together, in the Labyrinth, each equipped with paintball guns and a never-ending supply of ammo.

"Avi, darling, I think we've found the firey's!" Trin exclaimed as they entered one of the many areas of forests.

"We have?" That insane gleam turned very malicious. "Wooohoooo!" Avi and Trin were only there for 3 minutes before the firey's came out to see what was going on. Avi proceeded to nearly kill the damned annoying things with paintballs.

Lets just say that by dinnertime, Jareth was very sore and opted to eat in his rooms. Legolas was still in his bath trying to wash every ounce of paint out of his hair and having sore luck with it. Fekay was sitting in the dining room enjoying some very well cooked chicken, rice and tri-tip and Avi and Trin were once more in their room, doing nothing you all want to know about. The Labyrinth and the castle itself were covered in paintball induced color schemes and the goblins were passed out wherever they pleased, most of which places happened to be in the city.

Sleep that night only came easy for Fekay, Avi and Trin. Although in Avi and Trin's case, sleep didn't happen for quite a while.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Chapter Fin)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Heh….oh the fun one can have while torturing Jareth! Thank you for the paintball idea, again, it was such a good idea! So…anyone else got torture plans? Hm? Anyone here want to see Jareth pulling his own hair out in irritation? Or do we want to see a freaked out Jareth because Avi actually acts like the innocent little angel she resembles for more than a week? Any other suggestions? I hope you enjoyed this chapter and please Review me!


	5. Fragile

Misadventures in Labyrinth Land

Chapter 5: Fragile

I would like to take this opportune moment to thank everyone who has reviewed me thus far and to as, that even more people review it if they like because I'm always open to suggestions, like the paint ball guns, though were awesome and a suggestion from a reviewer!

This chapter is, unfortunately, based upon true events.

((((((((((This chapter deals with something serious, be warned.)))))))

Gleaming white wings were unfolded, shook and refolded again, littering the otherwise gleaming stone balcony with equally white but not so gleaming feathers. It was a glorious sunrise that was being watched by the sighing form the wings were attached too. The sun rose slowly, and she stood there, leaning on her elbows while her orange gaze kept vigil on the ever growing light that spread from beyond the borders of the labyrinth and was still spreading, just reaching the shining tops of the first few houses near the wall that ran between the Junkyard and the Goblin City.

Avi tore her eyes from the serene view of the sun drenched lands around and beyond the castles walls and turned the cat like gaze inwards to her rooms and her sleeping husband. His lithe form was turned towards the open balcony, the sheets revealing bare chest and arms, a slender neck and a peaceful face on a deep green pillow framed by his long, dark blonde hair. This elf was rather comfortable sleeping with his eyes closed these days and he looked the perfect picture of serenity as she watched that pale chest rise and fall with each passing breath.

Flashes of memory engulfed her in a sudden downpour of lucid images.

_The forest of Lorien was deathly quiet, the rotten scent that could only be found on the body of an Orc suddenly wafting past sensitive nostrils and the shriek of the attacking creatures. Flashes of Elvin steel and Orc blades in the afternoon sunlight filtering though the trees and the sounds as these weapons collided with forceful, purposeful blows. _

_Time slowed to a crawl and she collapsed onto the balcony floor, holding her head in her hands_

_No, dear gods no. She didn't want to relive this again, ever again even if it was only a memory. A vivid memory…_

_Time slowed down to a snails pace to the Elvin mutt as she watched her mellethnin, the one person in the world she cared about more than anyone or anything else, stepped in front of her to take an arrow instead of her. The crudely cut arrowhead protruded from his chest dripping blood and missing his heart by little more than half an inch, maybe. Rage filtered through her as she flung her last dagger, hitting the Orc between the eyes before rushing forward to cradle Trinion in her arms. It is the most agonizing feeling in the world to hold the one you love and know that there is nothing you can do as they die. To watch as the light faded from his beautiful green eyes, to feel as his heartbeat slowed and slowed until it beat its last measure of life's rhythm. To listen as his fading voice whispered out to her his last words as the primitive but effective poison on the arrowhead worked it's way though his body._

"_You are safe mellethnin. Love eternal."_

_She held him tightly even after his heart had stopped beating, her own shattering into an uncountable number of razor sharp shards. _

Tears streamed down her face both in the memory and there on that balcony where the memory had overtaken her. That is how Trinion awoke to find his beloved, hunched over on her knees, hugging her stomach and sobbing quietly.

"Avi?" He spared only a momentary glance before rushing to her side. "Mellethnin, what is wrong?" His voice was gentle and he found that she had suddenly all but thrown herself into his embrace, needing the comfort, and most of all the reassurance he was alive and well. The past week or so hadn't been the best for her, or for Jareth, not since the paintball incident which had been about 3 weeks ago.

Jareth had yelled and yelled at the poor girl for nearly 3 hours before tossing her none too gently in the Escher Room for another 6. It had been Fekay, not Jareth to let her out that evening and Jareth had ignored her presence ever since. Avi on the other hand, while not showing it on the outside had been torn apart by the treatment, not only by being stuck in the Escher Room for 6 hours, but by being ignored and hated by Jareth, a man she considered to be an elder brother of sorts. She'd even been losing sleep over the situation, knowing she'd really done it this time and not knowing how to fix it, if it even was fixable had found her tossing and turning for a few short hours before waking up well before every dawn ever since the fight.

However one-sided the fight may have been.

He sat there on the stone floor as the sun crept into the gardens and through the windows of the castle, holding her tightly and whispering soothing words in both elvish and English. He knew not what was plaguing her but was relieved when the sobs subsided, she'd cried herself to sleep in his arms.

"Trin? Avi?" There was a knock at the double doors to the couple's rooms and a voice that could only belong to Legolas called to them. "You've missed breakfast, and will miss lunch if you don't come out soon, is there anything wrong or are you two just sleeping in?" There was a perverted edge to his voice after that last theory.

Trin however, sat on the bedside holding tightly to Avi's hand. She had yet to wake up from her fitful sleep and so far, she'd been out for five hours and counting. He was unsure of how to answer Legolas for the boy was one of her best friends, he deserved to know and maybe he could even shed some light on why she'd suddenly broken down like that. Still…

"Well? Are you two all right? Do you plan on leaving anytime today?" Legolas was getting impatient already.

"No, we're not fine. At least she isn't." Trin answered, pulling the doors open as he did so, allowing Legolas to see Avi lying the bed but looking more like she'd been fighting off a storm then resting peacefully.

"What…?" Legolas was pulled inside the room and stood by the bedside. "What happened?"

"Well…" Trinion explained everything starting from the moment he'd woken up till the moment Legolas had knocked on the doors." She's been asleep for a good 5 hours now, sometimes it's fitful, sometimes it's peaceful but she wont' wake up, I've tried everything including ice cold water which usually works." He confided, watching as another period of obviously nightmarish sleep took over whatever peace she'd had in her dreamland a moment before.

"Do you think it's a nightmare? A memory? An enemy?" Legolas suggested, watching the elder ellon take her hand gently and offer soothing elvish words in an attempt to calm her down but not being very successful. "You're going to have to cradle her Trinion, it's the only way to really calm her down and guarantee she won't go into nightmare induced fit after you calm her down this time."

"How do you know for sure?" Trinion eyed him warily but pulled her into his arms none the less, anything to quell this for good.

"Haldir let me know after learning that Avi and I had become good friends. You remember when she first came to Middle Earth she was put into his charge and had horrible nightmares? Well…that was the only way to comfort her and he guessed, correctly may I add, that she'd still have the occasional nightmare away from him and Lorien, therefore he confided the fact to me so that I could calm her as well." Legolas explained, and it was true. While her nightmares had dwindled down to very few and far between she'd still had them once in a while so it was good for another person to know the secret to rescuing her, so to speak.

"She's more fragile then she seems." Trin replied quietly, nodding his understanding.

"That she is Trinion, I only wish Jareth would realize it before flying off the handle like he did 3 weeks ago. I'll admit, what she did wasn't pleasant for most of us but she was only having fun, and it was only paint. She did not deserve to be shoved into that twisted room to be forgotten and ignored." Legolas by this point was becoming a bit vehement towards Jareth.

"That's very true, he doesn't realize how emotionally fragile this girl is. Doesn't he understand that?"

"Of course not, he's half the reason she is that fragile, you know that!"

"No…I didn't."

"Oh…well for the record, he is."

Trin growled from his position on the bed with Avi curled up in his lap at this new information.

"Trin…" Avi sniffled in her sleep, holding tightly to his chest and breathing deeply. Both the males in the room looked down at her, half surprised, half relieved. "Love eternal…" She murmured and suddenly Trin knew exactly what was plaguing her.

"She is remembering my death…" He muttered, causing Legolas to turn sharp eyes on him.

"What?"

"She is remembering the day, no, the very moment of my death…" He held onto her even tighter with the new realization.

Legolas however, was slowly figuring out just why the memory had suddenly hit her with such force. When she lost Trinion, it had destroyed her almost completely and sent her back to a realm she hated if only to escape memories of him. Jareth had basically said that he hated her and never wished to see her again and had been keeping up with his words.

She thought that she'd lost Jareth.

"Jareth and I need to have a little talk." Legolas growled in a fiercer fashion than Trin had moments ago before exiting the room with Trin staring after him.

Though for the most part, Legolas was a perverted and leisurely prince-ling of an elf, Avi was his best friend. Little known to her though, he was well aware of her past, and well aware of how fragile she really was behind the prankster façade. He knew that she was often times cold and feigning indifference only because she felt she had too. She felt she had to be strong for those around her even though it only made her realize just how weak she was, or thought she was.

"JARETH!" Legolas screamed, walking determinedly into the throne room and getting in the Goblin Kings face.

"May I remind you, Prince Legolas, that you are a guest in my castle? A little more respect would be greatly appreciated and advised on your part." Jareth sneered to the younger prince, pushing him back down the few steps that led up to his throne with a finger shoved into his chest. Legolas narrowed his eyes and shoved right back, pushing Jareth down into his throne none to gently.

"You really are a despicable creature Jareth. Do you have any idea what you've caused with your rash and over reactive way of handling Avi's last prank? DO YOU?" His voice rose with every few words. "No…you don't, but you will!" Disregarding everything, and thankfully shocking Jareth to the point that he forgot he could have disappeared from the princes grasp, Legolas grabbed Jareth by the front of his grey shirt and dragged him to Avi and Trinion's rooms.

"Look Jareth, see what you've reduced your dear Avaria too!" Legolas shoved Jareth into the room before him, entering last and closing the doors gently.

Trinion was still cradling Avi in his arms, trying to keep her from entering into another period of fitful sleep. He succeeded, barely, for tears were leaking out of the corners of her closed eyes and her breathing was shallow and riddled with hiccups. Jareth could only stare at her, not sure what do make of this.

How could he have reduced her to this state? She was a very strong girl emotionally, or so he had thought but now, now he was beginning to doubt he knew her even half as well as he thought he did. Perhaps he had done what she had asked him not to do on many occasions, he had taken her at face value even though he had known her for so long, he had not bothered to truly know her and now, he had done a lot of damage.

"I did this?" he muttered, eyes wide and voice faltering.

"You did this." Legolas nodded at him. "Now how do you intend to fix it?"

Jareth couldn't answer that question for he had no clue as to how he could fix this.

(((((((((((((((((((Chapter Fin)))))))))))))))))))))))

Now, I know that for the most part this work of fiction has been silly, funny and not very serious but recently, things have happened in my life to the point of me having no other way to express it then this.

This chapter, and probably the next few will be based upon true events and mostly serious.

Ria, I may not have broken down here but I will say that things between us and him have gotten worse, I'm not sure if the damage can be undone this time, I'm really not.


	6. Defend Me

Misadventures in Labyrinth Land

Chapter 6: Defend Me

To Ria-Chan, my dear, as much I'd like to I cannot.

To Doctor Madwoman, my newest reviewer, thank you very much, believe me, I'll be using some of those ideas if only to get Jareth back.

THANK YOU TO ALL MY OTHER REVEIWERS!

Now then…this is an incredibly short chapter, and for that I'm very sorry but the next one shall be longer.

And….Kudos to my new Beta Reader: Lady Kiren!

((((((On With the Story))))

Silence.

Dead silence, not even the sounds of the labyrinth or the goblins in the city below, nor the servants and other things inhabiting the castle were heard. The king was in shock and the entire realm felt it down to the last little gingham faerie flittering about the outer labyrinth walls. Jareth stared at the sniffling, hiccupping form of the girl he thought was near invincible while Legolas and Trinion stared at him, the latter holding tightly to his beloved to ward off the lucid memories causing her nightmares.

A wail, a horribly agonized scream from deep within her throat for no more than thirty seconds. Jareth was brought to his knees with his hands over his ears and Legolas and Trin winced at the terrible sound but then dead silence again settled over the labyrinth and its inhabitants. Even the flies were no longer buzzing about wherever they could.

All eyes were now upon Avi.

She whimpered as her back arched in a painful fashion and her eyes opened, a brighter orange then they had been and full of shock and hurt.

"Put her on the bed and back away!" Legolas and Jareth exclaimed together, giving each other glares but rushing towards Trin all the same.

"What? Why?" Trin still held her tightly but was losing his grip as she began to thrash.

"You'll see! Now put her down!" Legolas yelled, freeing Avi from Trin's grasp while Jareth pulled the loving husband away from the girl who was now alone on the bed.

All questions died upon his lips as he watched Avi change, every one of the males in the room wincing. The cracking, popping and snapping of bones rang about the room as she writhed upon the covers. Her ears grew out, elongated and traveled to be more near the top of her head than the sides, as her back arched first outward then in as she shrank, inch by inch, moment by moment. Her bones shifted, her skin prickled as fur broke through in pitch black and white and after what seemed like ages to all in the room she was done changing.

"She's…" Trin began, walking gingerly towards the small, cowering figure on the bed.

"Being defensive," Jareth sighed.

"What do you mean she's being defensive?" Trin demanded, sitting on the edge of bed gently.

"It's what she does,"Legolas offered, not really sure how to explain it. "You mean she never told you?"

"Well no…I suppose she never had a reason to with me" Trinion never had and never would give Avi a single reason to ever be brought to such a state of confusion and terror, his death aside consider he had no control over that. Thus the girl had never seen it important to mention the form that rarely every got used anymore.

"Yes well, it's sort of a defensive tactic, except it's not." Jareth spoke, sitting on one of the plush chairs by the fireplace but facing the bed instead. "You see, she's got her elvish form, she's got her demonic form and then…she's got this." He motioned to the little ball of black and white fur that could only be described as, "Her kitten form. She's terrified, scared, and confused so she's gone, well, kitten." Jareth shrugged, trying to feign indifference and failing slightly.

"What are you keeping from us Jareth?" Legolas asked, eyes narrowed to warning slits.

"Well…I wish I could say that when she's calmed down she'll return to the form that we all have come to know but it is not that simple." Jareth sighed deeply. "This is going to take drastic measures I am afraid." As he sighed once more, Legolas and Trinion exchanged looks clearly saying they knew what he meant. Jareth was the reason she was like this and Jareth was going to have to fix it.

"That's a good little one." Trin smiled as he coaxed the kitten out from the shadows of the covers and into his lap where the shaking little thing stayed, glancing around with frightened eyes. "Well…Jareth, how do you intend to fix this since it is obviously because of you."

"How is this because of me?"

"You over reacted to nothing more than a prank that was easily taken care of the next day and stuck her in that twisted room of yours to be forgotten, Fekay had to let her out because he heard her pounding on the doors!" Legolas offered.

"You said you hated her, never wanted to see her again and you have completely ignored her presence for the past 3 weeks making her believe that she's lost you for good." Trinion finished.

"You have never truly noticed just how much the things you've done over the years have affected her and so you, have done more damage than you shall ever know." Came the medley of the two ellon's in the room, strong and truthful, causing Jareth to sink lower in his chair with every word.

"I…" The goblin king was for once in his life, at a loss for words. He was aware of things now that he had not been of before hand and well, it was a lot to take in for him. All went silent once more, intense stares were launched at Jareth as he stared at the ground and only the sounds of the labyrinth and the city, dulled though they were, could finally be heard.

That is until Avi gave a tentative, tiny little mewl in question staring at Jareth with her black and white head tilted to the side.

"Trinion, I believe I know how Jareth can fix this." Legolas smirked, walking over and picking up the kitten version of Avi gently, smiling as she nuzzled his hand. She by now stopped shaking but was still confused. It's awfully strange to suddenly go kitten and it leaves one rather disoriented but given the state she was in before, disoriented is probably an understatement.

"What?" Trinion asked, following Legolas. Avi may now be a kitten but she was still his wife.

"Jareth, you have to show her that you still care about her. You my dear sir must make sure that it is made perfectly clear to this little kitten that she has not lost you, therefore, until she changed you are stuck with her."

"WHAT?" Neither Trinion nor Jareth could believe what they'd just heard.

((((((((((((((Chapter Fin))))))))))))))))))))))))

Please Review!


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